Wednesday, January 23, 2008

I am Straight

I am not referring to any sexual orientation and I am not a homophobic, I am more of a homomania. I am talking about the things on top of my head, the thing which could make or break me, the thing that gets people calling me names (bitch, slut, or sweet angel), the source of all my powers, the thing I can’t go without…yep, I am talking about my hair.

It may sound beyond stupid, shallow & superficial, but it was an excruciating and painful battle to decide what sort of hair style I should pick next. I have had my long, frizzy, curly, wavy hair for over a year now, and it freaking bored me (yep, I am stingy and I dread wasting time and money in hair salons- no offense to Johnny, my fab English-Javanese speaking stylist). I have this “need” to change my hair style dramatically once in a while and shock my (very limited) crowd.

my glorious big & frizzy hair:

Finally, after consulting what felt like millions (read: +/- 5) of people from different ethnic, professional, financial, technical, and fashion background, I decided to have my hair straightened. What’s with the dilemma? Don’t Chinese-looking girls always look good in long straight hair? You’d think so. I had straight hair before, I looked like shit then and I thought I’d look like shit now.

For your reference (or entertainment):

Do you ever get the feeling of denial when you disagree with something so constitutional like, ‘everybody in HK loves raw salmon sushi’? I hate raw salmon sushi, but was in denial and kept trying it every single time, just in case I was just wrong as I don’t think I was that different from (almost) everybody in HK. At the end of each try, I’d go “I dun care if it was HK$100 a bite, I’d prefer the yellow and white HK$5 a stick siew mai over this shit.” Same thing applies to this whole hair straightening extravaganza. It looks good on everybody; it should look good on me, aye? Or so I thought.

this is wat I wanted:

Made up my mind, I went to Johnny’s with determination, ready to face the 5 hour straightening process, which would be spent sitting on salon’s chair, flattening my ass (flat ass isn’t a good thing, tight ass is). It is 2 weeks from Chinese New Year and Johnny’s place was as crowded as mornings at the wet market, where you have to elbow your way through all the shouting c-lais (aunties, grandmas, mommas) to get the least fresh bunch of broccoli (cos all the c-lais already got the good ones, fyi: you could never beat them). The straightening experience was not as gruesome as I expected…although I should’ve been more prepared and bring my own English celebrity gossip magazines and maybe a laptop with built in DVD player to catch up on project runway season 3. Anyways I had a good time browsing HK gossip magazines (a very quick browse as I could read any Chinese characters apart from my favorite foods, such as char siew, satay beef noodles and none of the celebrities were dumb enough to name themselves after some local junk food).

After 2.5 hours of washing, conditioning, pulling, ironing, slathering, blow drying, cutting, layering, trimming, more blow drying, and styling, finally Johnny gave my hair the final touch of snip and voila…I was going after Chantal’s (from ANTM cycle 9) hair style and I got Emily the strange.

this is what I got now, I couldn't even pass for Emily the Strange:
Despite all the positive comments I received (looking good, looking younger, looking more innocent- yeah right, and looking like my good girl alter ego), I am still missing my big frizzy hair. Let’s wait for tat bitch to come back.

the bitch with big & frizzy hair

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