Thursday, April 21, 2011

3D Sex & Zen: Extreme Ecstasy 萬眾期待既肉蒲團看後感


This movie is currently the talk of the town. How could we not go watch it? It's like not watching...I dunno...Titanic? Although I wouldn't necessarily put them both in the same category heheheh. But still. It's so popular, we just had to go see it. In fact, I am not ashamed to admit that I asked SC to go & watch it. There's nothing to be ashamed of, the theater was full of ladies of different ages...from young OLs to aunties.

日日都成為娛樂版頭條既肉蒲團, 老老實實, 唔睇真係走寶, 唔可以講自己跟得上潮流(即係out左..), 個個朋友都係度講就好似去返世界杯既時候, 大家都有個共同既話題, 只不過今次唔係足球, 而係人球(波)...XDDD 睇完一開燈, 嘩, 70%都係女黎, 真係估都估唔到...原來女仔都對哩方面有好奇架!!!

Here are our comments on the flick, mine in English and SC's in Chinese.
Mine first.

I went expecting nothing. Yes, my expectation was that low. I wasn't expecting to be entertained, I wasn't expecting to be wowed by the 3D effects (come on!), and I surely wasn't expecting to be turned on (seriously!). I was fully prepared to be absolutely appalled and disgusted, and I was not.

Let me tell you what I love from the movie:
- Saori Hara (the girl in the picture above)
Hot hot hot. That face, the boobies, the curve of her hips. I'm not "into girls" that way, but still, she's a major eye candy!
Lots of boobies with pink nipplage
I don't know if this is wrong (I don't think so), but I love gawking at boobies. There were plenty of them, all sizes and shapes, and they are very very nice.
- It's FUNNY!
Seriously, I am not trying to tell the "classic excuse" that's said by anyone who just watched any form of erotica. There were some seriously funny stuff in the story line, the dialogs, and the use of Hong Kong every day expletives. I particularly love the parts with the two "doctors", one of them played by Hong Kong veteran comedian, Tenky Tin. The dialogs were hilarious and so smoothly delivered. The whole theater shakes with laughters throughout the movie.

How about the sex scenes?
There were "clever" funny ones, stupid funny ones, standard Japanese AV ones where the girl seemed/sounded as if the whole thing was excruciatingly painful instead of enjoyable and the guy pounded ridiculously hard and fast (please don't learn from this, gentlemen!), some crazy surreal ones, and some girl on girl action (yeah, baby!).

This is a category III erotica, not AV, thus don't expect to see a full blown uncensored porn.

There's this funny stuff going around, people complaining to be disappointed by Vonnie Lui (or lack thereof), a local beauty, known for being "well endowed".
Gentlemen, seriously?!
I can't blame them though, I'm not sure if many of them know enough about boobies not to be fooled by the media aka gossip magazines. In Hong Kong, there are two sets of boobies measurement standard. Real measurements vs media measurements. It's something like this...AA cup = C cup, A = D, B = E, C = F, D = G. Or worse, sometimes even A = F. I guess the formula depends on how much pads were in the bra, or how much boobies were digitally "inflated"?
Vonnie was known to be a whopping 36F beauty. So, when there were only a few seconds of her boobies, and they didn't seem to be "up to the standard" in terms of volume (aka, they allegedly looked like A on screen? I couldn't judge since it was indeed too fast), speculations were flying from everywhere. Did she use a body double? Did she lie about her measurements in the first place? Etc etc etc. She claimed that she's lost weight for the movie, thus reducing her 36Fs to..I dunno. She was crying and all...poor thing.

To me, she still looks damn good on screen.

*spoiler alert, if you don't wanna know, please don't read*
Some people were complaining how they didn't get turned on by this movie. SC told me (he could be lying, although I wouldn't mind either way hehe), that once he heard Vonnie speaking in the movie, and the voice was that of a GUY, and there's a super long CG dick attached to her crotch, that's the end of it. There was no way that he could get turned on by THAT.

Anyway, we had a lot of fun watching this 3D erotica. In my opinion, the 3D part wasn't necessary, but I must admit that without the 3D gimmick, we probably wouldn't have known that watching erotica in theaters could be so entertaining. There was no one single boring minute for me.

Don't trust me, go and watch it yourself ;)
Now, SC's comments :D

其實入場前都睇左好多唔同既review, 好既, 唔好既, 其實都心裏有數, 所以入場既時候都冇乜冀望, 當普通戲咁睇. 帶上3D眼鏡, 就開始, 一開頭D山景都係好3D, 香港既功力追得上菏里活級數, 抵讚!!

由於大家可能仲未睇出戲, 為免劇透, 都係唔係度講劇情啦

1. 日本國出了名的AV騎兵- 原紗央莉
爆血度: ***

日本同德國混血兒, 隻眼係金黃色的, 其他地方都係粉紅色的!!!

2. 極多緋聞既中國代表 - 藍燕

爆血度: ***

我個人覺得佢好靚, 好有中國古典味, 可惜, google左佢原來都係混血兒...中俄...

3. 另一位日本AV騎兵 - 周防雪子

爆血度: **

個樣有D似深田恭子同Suki既混合版, 咪以為佢好斯文


4. 香港既偽點代表 - 雷凱欣

爆血度: 負星

一直都好鐘意佢, 但係今次出肉蒲團真係另我對佢改觀, 一直都聲稱36F既佢, 係出戲度只係露左佢對32A既胸2秒, 眨一眨眼都冇左, 好多人都話佢用替身, 冇可能36F變到32A...點都好, 同其他國家既佳麗比, 佢真係好小家咁...

哩出戲呢, 攪笑係60%, 血腥係15%, 其他既就係冰淇淋時段
但大家千萬不要抱住睇AV既心理去睇, 始於哩出係三級片, 唔係日本AV...全片係冇第三點的...
真估唔到既係田雞都有份拍! 佢真係爆笑既核心..XDD

最後, 本人覺得哩出戲係絕對睇得過既, 支持香港電影, 3D, 創意業!!!!! 香港!!香港!!香港!!




The Golfer said...

Come on SC... give us a translation of your comment... :)

Anonymous said...

hahaha! I know what you mean, I want to watch it too just for the sake of watching it. Pretty funny post ;)

Angelica said...

Lol, I saw this post on my blogfeed and was like: whaa?

Does this mean that the HK erotic film industry is being revived? I remember a few years ago, there was a film about chopsticks, haha!

LyddieGal said...

I love the fact that they made it in 3D... just so funny and gimmicky. I had to go watch the trailer on youtube, since I doubt this film will make it to a theater near me, haha.

shellie said...

a girl with cg penis? i cant resist a movie with that kind of action hahhahaa sounds like it was a fun movie. hopefully it will be on netflicks soon!